Florida man Dec 16th 2009 – Florida man damages egyptian pyramids whilst taking photographs
On Dec 16th 2009, a Florida man was arrested for damaging the Egyptian pyramids whilst taking photographs. The Florida man set down his camera equipment and began climbing the pyramid to get in position, but was not happy with one of the rocks on the pyramid casting a shadow so he broke the rock and removed it.
After removing the rock with 16 swift blows, the Florida man was arrested as the broken rock opened up a pressure hole on the other side, which blew 16 tourists up and out of the main entrance to the pyramid. All 16 tourists were taken to the local hospital, with some requiring up to 16 stitches for gashes across their legs.
Florida man Dec 16th 2011 – Florida man wins wrestling competition
On Dec 16th 2011, a Florida man won a wrestling competition in Ohio, after placing a bet on himself to win. The Florida man had gone to the local bookkeepers and placed 16 separate bets on himself, with winnings totalling over $400,000 if he won. After winning the wrestling competition, bookkeepers were furious as the 16 bets suspiciously all came in. The bets included the wrestler teabagging the first competitor, sticking his fingers up at the judges against the second competitor and biting an opponent’s nipple off.
The Florida man was arrested and charged for 16 counts of betting fraud, and is set to serve an 18 month wrestling ban.
Florida man Dec 16th 2017 – Florida man sells multi billion dollar company to invest in pet shark tanks
On Dec 16th 2017, a Florida man sold his multi billion dollar construction company, including the multi million dollar deals already lined up so he could invest all of his money into pet shark tanks. The billionaire told us ‘I got one, shark tanks are the future man, you’ve not lived until you have a shark in your living space’.
The Florida man was seen brokering deals at local aquariums and even approached sea world as he brokered a deal to take their sharks.
Some ethics were spoken about with considerations as to the space required for sharks to roam, but the Florida man believed that sharks do not need to move to be happy, as they just require food. The Florida man began his new business by purchasing 400,000 tanks to cater for Great white sharks, along with an import order of 400,000 live sharks from Japan.
So far the business has yet to make a sale, and the Florida man has declined to comment on his losses. It is reported that each tank cost the Florida man 16 times what was expected, at $700 per tank, and each shark cost $1,000 to import. Along with food costs, it looks like this Florida man will be declaring bankruptcy before the end of 2018.
Our thoughts
We’ve seen worse dates for the infamous Florida man, but we have to say, one bankrupting himself instead of living comfortably for the rest of his life, what a stupid Florida man.